Image

Ramadan Diaries 2018 – Day 1: Changes

As I’m typing this I realise how neglected the blog has been for a whole year and how much I’ve missed it.

A lot has happened since last year and I’ll just have to share it all in one burst.

My brother got married in December 2017 and honestly the months leading up to it was horrendous! We’ve not had a family wedding in 18 years, so this all felt new to us. It tested all our relationships and there were tears and bruises along the way. Thankfully it ended well and we’ve grown bigger as a family.

And it was all over…till it became by turn.

 

RD Day 1 wedding pic

Yes, I myself married in April 2018 to the most wonderful man on earth, who has changed my world. Its been a big change in my life and I’m still coming to terms with knowing I’ve got someone waiting for me at home. It’s all still very new to us and it’s genuinely strange to think how I lived before this – I smile at the word ‘husband’ and ‘married’ but it all feels surreal. I’m living a very out of body experience at the moment and with it now being Ramadan, it feels even stranger.

To not wake up to my parents, the dining table, the dishwasher and the beloved kitchen sink for Ramadan is very bizarre. I’m missing mum dozing off on the sofa whilst she watches Ramadan charity shows. I’m missing the annual Tesco shopping of 10+ bags of 10 kg rice and 5L oil cans. I’m missing dad burning the house down and setting off the poor fire alarm every other day in his desire to have the crispiest pakora. I’m missing blogging from my bedroom after midnight whilst the house slept and the smell of fry ups and oud would waft in through the window from our neighbours. I’m missing my parents and I think I’m still realising it.

But I’ve gained a lot too.

My new family is amazing! They make me almost forget I’ve left home. And this Ramadan I’ve already felt the love.

The struggle for Day 1 was just that; dehydrated from lack of water and feeling like I needed nap for the entire day at work. Students were happy to see me back after my long wedding absence. Stranger still was being told off for leaving them and then being welcomes back so warmly  – I underestimated how much of an impact I was making and it made my day. It’s hard to tell if you’re having any affect on their lives or making any valuable differences.

RD Day 1 U R Ace Awards

And that’s what I’m gradually learning about my marriage  – we’re constantly trying to keep each other happy without maybe seeing how we’re unconsciously doing it anyway. Effort is important but to trivialise the daily acts is a discredit to what is helping your relationship grow.

RD Day 1 Table

My mother wanted to pull out all my first Ramadan with them – I just about held her back.

RD Day 1 my iftar

Day 1 complete.